Wednesday, 6 August 2014

Fun as

Success Criteria


DEEP FEATURES
Brainstorms to identify main ideas to be used in writing.
Uses most of the main ideas in the writing.
Uses paragraphs and sequences ideas.
Attempts to end writing with a simple conclusions.
SURFACE FEATURES
Spells most words correctly.
Uses capital letters, full stops, commas, apostrophes, question marks, exclamation marks.
THE REWORKER / EDITOR
Rereads writing to edit out information that does not improve the message.
Rereads writing to edit in words and phrases that improve the message.
Uses a dictionary to identify and check spelling attempts.
Checks writing for basic punctuation.


Today I am writing about the holidays. 


I went to Wellington, it was so exciting. I went on the cable car and on the east west ferry. The cable car is a train that you go up and at the top is a museum. I didn't see much. The east west ferry is a little ferry that goes to lots of places. I forgot the places name. I went to Te Papa. Te Papa is a place that has lots of stuff  
and you can look at lots of stuff.


I was so excited because …. I am going to Marlborough. I went with my friends in Wellington. We went on a bike ride because we forgot to bring the keys but we found the spare keys. We chilled that day. The next day we went to the park and I liked the flying fox. We went to the movies we saw How To Train A Dragon 2.  

“ Yay “ I am going to Inflatable World today with Taylor. I walked in to Inflatable World. I looked around and raced to the cling wall. You had to run over a big lump and climb up on the cling wall.   

I enjoyed all the stuff I did in the Holidays. Seriously - I loved this holiday !!

1 comment:

  1. Dear Jemma I like the way you spelt all of the words right
    I like the that you put most of the main words in
    I wish you could use a dictionary to spell your words better
    did you do anything more at inflatable world

    ReplyDelete